Another Rant :)

So the downstairs bathroom renovations have resumed, if it was up to me I would have fired this guys ass long ago, but unfortunately I only rent, so it is my landlady's decision, ugh.

I don't like this guy AT ALL !!, he is very arrogant and I think he feels women should be seen and not heard, I am pretty intuitive and I think I'm right.  Well, too bad for him as I am defiantly not the be seen and not heard type lol

Just a few things, they never clean up when they leave, there is dust and wood chips all over the downstairs, all over the floor, the stairs and the front entry. It takes me a half hour at least to clean it up when they leave, and I have to clean it as Tate sleeps down there, I don't want him walking through this stuff or breathing it in.

Then there is the gate, they continually leave it open, once when they did I wasn't home and Brad let Lync out, not even thinking about the gate as it is always closed, it wasn't!  They had left for the day and just left it wide open.  I don't know how long Lync was out roaming around in the front of the house, Brad said he came as soon as he called, thank god we never just let the dogs out and then leave them, we always check with in about 5 minutes.  It still upsets me to think of what could of happened.

Yesterday I was in the back yard with all the dogs, we have Perkins here as well, he comes out , leaves the gate wide open and walks down the driveway, so I called out to him, "you need to close the gate" ...with his back to me he yells, "I know!!! " in this angry tone!  Well!  I say "if you know then close it!"  The stare he gave me! it was like he was wishing me dead, seriously! I stared him down of course, I am no whimp, but again, the feeling of him thinking, "shut up woman or I'll choke you" was very obvious!

He, and his wife, are continually asking to use our bathroom, I didn't even think of that but I don't like it , yesterday when he asked I was moving the dogs into the livingroom so he could pass, Tate was last to move and was kind of standing there, he actually pushed his head and said "go on" !! Oh boy, I'm going to smack this guy!  I looked at him & said, he is hard of hearing and old, give him a second! ahhhhh!!

The entire thing is just yucky, and so much worse for me as I don't sleep, and I need to get up very early as I have to get all the dogs fed, and outside, and back in, and contained, before he arrives.  It's fine with Kort and Lync, but Tate, like me, needs time to get moving in the morning, it's just all so inconvenient.

I know it will come to an end , but it really needs to happen soon, I feel like I can't do what I want in my own house right now, I can't even get downstairs to do laundry, rather I need to find the time to do it at night.
I know , I'm a complainer! but it really is a pain in the ass for a bathroom I'll never even use!!!!

Sleep

Sleep.........a totally unappreciated ability by so many.  I would give anything for sleep, to be able to fall sleep, to stay asleep, to wake up refreshed instead of tired.  I feel like I am being tortured, night after night after night.

It is an unseen problem therefore so hard for to people to understand when you make the statement, "I'm so tired" Most people are tired, just from everyday life, but I am seriously , 100% loosing my mind, tired!

Right now , at this moment, I want to cry.  I have just tried to have a nap but my mind and body will not allow me to, when I start to drift off I jump, my mind will not shut down.  Most likely as it is daytime.

I have been like this since I was in grade school.  I would lay awake long after my sisters were asleep, long after my parents were asleep as well.

For example last night I went to bed at 11, I woke up twice before hearing Tate puking in the livingroom at 2am. After that I was awake again twice more, once at 5am , the other time I didn't look.
I don't look at the clock all the time, I've heard and read all the stuff on not looking at the time, turning your clock around, not watching tv before you go to sleep, I have tried all of it, nothing works. I've tried the natural stuff like melatonin that was hilarious, I probably could have taken the whole bottle, I even got a prescribed medication from my Dr and it did nothing at all.

The very worst thing for me is to wake up by an alarm, not waking naturally in the morning.  I seriously could just cry, especially if it's been a rough night . The bathroom renovations have been killing me, having to wake at 7am, especially hard on the days the contractor doesn't show up.
My head feels heavy as do my eyes, I want to sleep so bad.

I had a test done a week ago, the one that checks the oxygen levels when you are sleeping, it checks to see if you have sleep apnea as well.  I am still waiting for those results.

I do think it has something to do with responsibility on my part, at least right now.  I find the best sleep I get is when I am at my moms without my dogs.  I know they don't need me, I don't need to get up to feed them , or let them outside, but as a young child I didn't have that responsibility so that wasn't the problem then.

I do make an effort to not mention it to people, but when someone asks "how are you?"  I want to respond "tired" but I don't feel I have a right to.  I am not working right now, so I feel I have no right to complain about being tired, so I am writing it in my blog.  I can complain here and no one can roll their eyes or think "how can she be tired, she doesn't even work?"  Well at least I can't see you rolling your eyes lol

At any rate it is a serious problem for me, it takes me a long time to get moving, I seriously have to sit and just do nothing for a half hour every morning before I can start my day.  Of course the dogs get to go out first, but after that .

I have decided that if I do go back to work it will never be a job where I have to leave in the morning, never ever ever again.

Work, that's a whole other blog post lol

Collies On Line

This is Tate's Ad for our Collies On Line this week, they did an awesome job!  I am also putting one in our Collie Club Of Canada's magazine, I'm just a little bit proud of him ♥

Happy Birthday Tate !!!

The Birthday Boy, taken by Amanda Labadie

Today Tate is 12 years old.

I never thought I would have him this long, he was so sick last September.  He came back from that episode and became even better then ever. He has since been to the Canadian National Collie Specialty and won Best Rough Veteran.  He is full of spark and is enjoying every second of his life, and I am enjoying every second of his life with him.  I don't want it to end, ever.  The love I have for him is very deep, everyone loves their dogs , I know, but Tate helped me at a time in my life when my depression was rearing it's ugly head.  I had lost Drake a year before, Brad told me I was depressed, that I needed a dog, I thought he was crazy, I didn't want to put my heart out there ever again, but I wrote my breeder.  She had bred Tate's mom and the puppies were due in just one week, how was that for timing?  I told her I might ber interested in a sable male if she had one.

Fast forward a week, Tate's breeder called and left a message on my answering machine, the litter was born, 5 puppies, 3 sable girls, 2 tri boys.  I listened to the message and started to cry.  I did not want a tri colour, I  disliked the colour, what surprised me is I hadn't realized that I even wanted another dog until I thought I wasn't getting one.

Brad came home and through my tears I told him we weren't getting a puppy, that the boys were tri coloured.  He said "so, why can't we get a tri colour?? you can always have a brown one later"  Ha ha, so that is how Tate came to be, thank you Brad.

I have always said Tate is perfect, he has never ever done anything wrong, his temperament is absolutely perfect, he is gentle with children, loves all people, loves all animals, he is amazing, I am crying just thinking about how wonderful he is and how much joy he has brought, and is still bringing, into my life

I love you Tater dog, and I hope to love you for many more years , Happy Birthday Old Friend ♥

Easy Come, Easy Go

There were 2 things I wanted to do with my tax refund this year,
#1 and most important, pay for Lync, done!
#2 buy a rug cleaner, done!, it looks like the one above, I am thrilled to death with it!!!! Tate has had numerous accidents in the house in the last year, pee and poop! so this baby is a godsend!!!  I've done the livingroom already and will tackle the halls and bedroom tomorrow. 
The money was nice to have, and I didn't waste it on silly things so I am proud of myself.

13 years

It's 13 years today that I helped Drake over the Rainbow Bridge, miss you Drake ♥

In his breeders hands

one of the pictures his breeder sent me (by mail) so I could see him

The first time I saw Drake, picked him up at the Minneapolis airport

My favourite picture of us

Drakes' last time in the show ring, he was 10 years old and we competed in Veterans

Bits and Pieces

Not much happening these days, but I am always busy doing something, sounds weird but it's true.  Not working means more work, just in other areas.  I am always cooking, mostly for the dogs but I am also cooking meals for Brad when he is on days, he likes this and thinks I should stay home forever, I agree !  I walk alot, it helps to clear my mind, I still struggle with anxiety so walking helps.

I am physically still having a rough time, mornings are brutal, getting out of bed is a challenge, especially my back and hip.  I am still not sleeping, I finally have my sleep clinic appt on Monday, just to measure the amount of oxygen I am getting, not sure how they will get an accurate reading if I am not asleep!

Lync is growing up and his training is going well, last week at class was the first time I felt like he was attentive only to me, he wasn't looking around at all the other dogs, he is understanding he is working at that moment.  It still needs to be finalized, but Lync is officially all mine now! Not just being raised by me, but mine, bought and paid for ! It feels good, thank goodness for people like Liz and Andy ,  they knew Lync was the perfect dog for me so they made sure I got him.

My van is still a disaster, so many things still wrong with it, I try very hard not to think about it, it really depresses me, like alot.

I am trying Kort on raw again, it's been 8 days, it's also been 8 days of diarrhea, not frantic running outside every half hour, but when he goes it is not formed, it was once though, that gave me hope that it will happen again.   I am going to stick it out for a bit longer as Kort loves it! Right now I am just giving him chicken, not balanced I know, but it won't hurt him for a long time to eat this way, I am hoping to get his system used to just one protein before I add more.

Tate is amazing, going to the dog show rejuvenated him! I am so happy!!

Well that's all of the little bits of stuff happening that I can think of for now

Camrose Dog show , Part 2

Well this is Tate's story, I've already said it all, an experience and memories that will last me a lifetime, of course I put together an tragically long long video for him, so feel free to watch it , or not